by The song that you choose for your first dance should reflect who you are as a couple; it should be personal. Remember, it will be “your song” for the rest of your life.
There are many wonderful songs out there with romantic sounding titles and lovely melodies that appear to be love songs-but in reality are about something entirely different than true love. It’s important to choose a song that’s meaningful to you, something that reflects who you are as a couple. It can be fun, silly or romantic and if it isn’t a typical love song-and that’s totally OK. But you sure don’t want to mistakenly select a song that contradicts the message of your wedding day.
Here is our helpful guide to steer you away from those cringe worthy first dance mishaps with classic tunes that couples often mistake for love songs.
The Police – Every Breath You Take
It sounds like a great love song, but if you listen closely, it’s totally stalkerish! It brings up images of a jilted ex threatening to keep tabs on his former love, watching her every waking moment – definitely not romantic. In fact Sting himself was shocked to find out that his song was popular as a first dance saying, “I think the song is very, very sinister and ugly and people have actually misinterpreted it as being a gentle little love song.”
Pixies – Here Comes Your Man
Seattle’s alternative couples are often drawn to this song, it has a bit of a retro nostalgia feel and you might think it’s about a girl waiting for her boyfriend. Ah Nope! The song is actually about homeless people dying in a big earthquake in California according to the Frank Black the artist who wrote the song. Not an image that you want in your head as you hold each other in your arms for the first dance.
Bruno Mars – Marry You
This song soared in popularity after becoming a YouTube sensation when a couple used it to dance into their wedding ceremony. Even GLEE picked up and redid it for the wedding of a main character. Unfortunately, it’s about a man who’s not to sure if he does or does not want to get married and describes the wedding as “something dumb to do” when “trashed”. Fun, upbeat, sure… but the right song to start the beginning of a lifetime commitment? Not so much!
REM – The One I Love
Yep, this is another song with a title that sounds perfect but in reality it’s another jilted ex ballad. And while the first line sounds incredibly romantic, the rest of the song is definitely not first dance material.
Celine Dion – My Heart Will Go On
The love song the proudly proclaims her love will go on…. After the love of her life has frozen to death in front of her. Of course, this song was Titanically popular, but for many it still brings up images of all those dead bodies floating around. We could be wrong, but we think it’s just not quite the right imagery for the oh so perfect first dance.
Whitney Houston – I Will Always Love You
Ok, this is clearly a song about two people breaking up, not getting married, or even staying together. Sure, the chorus makes it sound like a romantic love song, but the rest of the song is all about breaking up. “So goodbye, please don’t cry, we both know I’m not what you need”. Yep, definitely not the song you need for your first dance.
Wham – Careless Whisper
This is a nice slow ballad by George Michael, luckily a little less popular now for weddings, but still occasionally seen on our request lists. With lyrics like “Guilty feet sure have no rhythm” and “Should’ve known better than to cheat a friend” this song is all about apologizing for cheating. Yeah, let’s think about something else for a first dance.
Bon Jovi – Always
Oh, is sounds so romantic – promising to love someone “always”? But wait, you guessed it, another break-up song!
Adele – Make You Feel My Love
This song is a wonderful sounding melodic ballad, but when you carefully consider the lyrics, you immediately sense that it’s about a women desperately voicing her need to make her partner feel her love – it’s definitely not about two people sharing a bond of love as they enter into a marriage together as equal loving partners.
Will Smith – Just The Two Of Us
This song is often requested as a first dance when it is confused with the original. Will Smith’s version was inspired by Bill Withers’ and Grover Washington, Jr.’s love song of the same title; Smith’s version samples and incorporates lyrics from the original. But, instead of love between a couple, “Just the Two of Us” focuses on the relationship between a father and son. Choose the original, it’s beautiful and perfect as a first dance, but keep away from this version.
Please don’t let this list discourage you; it’s really very easy to find that song that is just right for your first dance! Here are a few tips to follow:
• Choose a love song that’s actually about love and a happy relationship.
• Pick a song that reflects who you are as a couple or one that is special to your relationship. Perhaps it is a song that just feels right, or a song that you enjoyed listening to on your first date, or a song from a movie you both enjoyed together.
• Find a song that has meaningful lyrics and a melody that is good for dancing. It can be easy to focus only on one over the other, but just make sure that when you choose your song, you’ve carefully listened to all the lyrics and the speak to you as a couple.
• Don’t be afraid to ask a trusted music expert for some advice. I suggest Sounds Unlimited!